Praise Him

I’ve changed. My heart, character, and everything =) Perhaps it’s because I’ve surrounded myself with people wh0 understand me especially my “Faith, H0pe & L0ve” and with G0d’s pe0ple <Praise the l0rd> or perhaps I am n0w m0re open and willing for the L0rd to teach me and deal with my hassles as He pleases. =)


N0w I manage t0 deal with the “pain” and many other issues that have happened in my lives. Thru camps and gathering, I have already learnt s0 many new things about my life, both past and present. Last few weeks were a p0int of complete joy in my life. As I read aloud the prayers to God, I was overjoyed at the realization that the healing that He did in my life almost many years ago was real and completely solidified in my heart and spirit.


L0rd, I pray that you w0uld c0ntinue to m0uld me into the woman of God that you created me to be. Let me be sensitive to Your spirit and to what You are saying to me. May my life be acc0rding t0 y0ur will c0z I kn0w that Y0u has a better plan f0r me. I will waiting patiently with this humble heart ^^.

^^ Thank y0u Debbie, nick, Brenda, beatrine and everyb0dy!!! What I have learnt fr0m 0thers: When there is hatred, sh0w them L0VE; when there is injury, show them PARD0N; when there is doubt, show them FAITH; when there is despair, show them H0PE and when there is sadness; share them the JOYFULNESS! G0d teaches us a l0t! really3 banyak 0wh!! Let us strengthen our faith, h0pe and love to G0d. Amen!

My prayers were answered??

hmmm.... n0 m0re dilemma i guess......
i still d0ubt th0ugh ~( \-0-/ )~
ya amp0n!!! AM s0 gila~

lately, many go0d things had happened!
Praise the L0rd! ^^

last nite "Student Mass"

"pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for YOU in Christ Jesus." ~ 1 Thessalonians 5:17-18

hehe... i like??? eeerrrr... i was sh0cked actually! i like but... eeeerrrrr.....
.......

lifenite! i like it t0oo~
i have 1 go0d news!!!!
"cant tell ya!!- bu neng su0 de mi mi"
i am s0 excited th0ugh!!! <really?? dunn0 actually>
i am s0 clueless [[[[>>>>>_____<<<<<<]]]]



Verse of the day!!! -f0r me!!!-

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek His will in all you do, and He will show you which path to take." Proverbs 3:5-6

Di - Le- mma~

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~(^_^)'''~

This year I am thankful for:

1. G0d’s presence in my live! H0ly Spirit in me! Praise y0ur name in the highest! 

2. The friendships that G0d has blessed me with “LIFEFIRES, LIFELINERS, <special Gifted friends> and my sweet c0ursemates ‘few only’”

3. My family & friends & me health! Thank y0u Jesus! L0ve l0ve l0ve..

4. My amazing and incredible M0m & Dad ~(>,<)~ I l0ve M0mmy & Daddy!!

5. My sweet siblings – Gung, Ling, Y0yo n Yiyi. ~(>.<)~v I l0ve y0u all!!

6. My new gifts and My sweet Guardian Angel “Val”^^ I l0ve y0u Daddy G0d!!

7. Every opportunity I've received to use my gifts to bring God’s glory.

8. Healing!! ARM0UR UP, LIFEFIRE camp & LSS <^,^> l0ve l0ve l0ve…

9. Gathering every Wed & Fri!! The utm0st!! R0sary prayer!!! [>,<]v

10. Every m0ment that has br0ught a smile to my face and a tear to my eye.

11. FAITH, H0PE, L0VE, C0URAGE & GRACE ^^v

12. All my prayers being answered. Praise the L0rd!! I l0ve y0u Jesus ^^

13.. The pe0ple who keep me in their prayers. G0d bless wh0ever y0u are! =) I pray f0r y0u als0 ^^

14. Every0ne who has supported me financially “L0vely daddy and m0mmy”

15. Being able to dream and kn0w that thru God anything is p0ssible! Hehe <^,^>

16. The opportunities i've received to enc0urage others & supp0rt them by using mine & their gifts.

17. Being able to learn fr0m 0thers thru “sharing”. Thank y0u all br0 n sis in Christ. L0ve l0ve l0ve..

18. Praise & W0rship s0ngs!! Hills0ng, planet shakers etc… [>,<]v

19. Facebo0k, because it lets me c0nnected with G0d’s people!

20. My lecturers – kn0wledge they shared. <^.^>

Thank y0u L0rd f0r every pers0n y0u've placed in my life, every situati0n that has made me laugh & smile, every s0ngs that passed my lips, every moment I have felt loved, and thank y0u m0st of all for l0ving me en0ugh t0 die for me.^^

When Mr.S.A.Tan c0nquer y0ur feeling!!!! Yeay!!!

It is really hard t0 resist!!!!!!

Extremely hard!!!

 After divine mercy, I felt s0 unwell “y0u kn0w what”

I hate!! I hate!! Key w0rd-“unf0rgiveness”!!!

weeeehhhhhh!!!!!!!!

I feel s0 angry 0wh n0w!!!!!

I d0nt wanna pray!!! I d0nt want!!!

S0 what??? Wh0 cares!!!!!

I became s0 selfish!!!! Egoism!!!! 

I d0nt kn0w why!!!

I feel like wanna sh0ut!!! rebel!!!

Rebel???

I d0nt feel pain th0ugh!

I feel satisfied!!!

Nah, best 0wh!!!!

I D0NT WANT PRAY OKAY!!

I LIKE THIS FEELING!!

S0 C0MF0RTABLE, S0~

<I am dealing with this feeling rite n0w- 25 0ct, 23:43>

Waaaa…. Kerezey, chill dude…

N0w feel like wanna cry!!! @%^&*

Beautiful savi0ur s0ng really help la tis time~

Effect: after 10 times replayed I guess…

G0d is my faith, h0pe & L0ve.

He always be there f0r me, t0 help me, Amen.

Faith, H0pe & L0ve.. eerr~

I d0nt feel w0rry ab0ut my internship place… why??? Perhaps, I kn0w that G0d always has a better plan f0r me, where He wanna thr0w me?? Hahaha… I just surrender everything into His hands f0r He is my Beautiful Savi0ur. Yeay!!! Amen!

I am sad n0w, because here, I mean UMS, yea… I have many w0nderful friends, especially lifefire sweet friends. I am s0 sad, extremely sad like wanna die dis “like wanna 0nly, d0nt w0rry, I w0nt kill ma self c0z I l0ve myself” w0w.. I l0ve me! Yeay!!! Hahaha… all the w0nderful friends are still here next semester while me with 0thers “cute friends-ciela, aiwen, lv, emmae, alisa and supercute ambr0se” are leaving… I am g0nna miss y0u all f0r sure. Sad 0wh n0w… if can, I wanna stay here and d0 internship near UMS here la and apply r0om at kge. Hahaha.. s0unds ridicul0us~

My dearest sweet friends- lifefire 0f c0urse,à Sue, Nick, Shar0n, Dan, Pat, Brenda, Jasmine, Maureen, m0st 0f them kan already final year 0wh… I am s0 sad T_T next2 sem am n0t g0nna see them again… waaaaa…. Tambah T_T…. I d pr0mise maself that im g0nna drive t0 UMS s0metimes f0r lifefire gathering~ if ma parents all0w me t0 d0 s0… h0pefully. Amen. Ahahaha… G0d, all these w0rriness and sadness, I leave it unto Y0ur hands c0z y0u are my Decisi0n maker. Wh00aaa… hebat 0wh G0d… Thank y0u daddy G0d. I l0ve y0u. I’ll accept whatever plan that y0u will make f0r me because I Believe in Y0u ^_~v

I am g0nna miss all the sweet leaders and l0vely friends~ eeee~ why la this semester seems very special t0 me, early sem terribly bitter! Then, all the sweet and s0ur part were during this m0ment, alm0st end semester. Can I ask d0raem0n t0 st0p the time? Hahaha… I juz f0und my “ultraman gang” recently after I’ve been g0ne thru this life with hardship “y0u kn0w what” hahaha… the leader ultraman la I always share pr0blem, the p0wer and m0nsters t0 be defeated. Hahaha.. Meanwhile, I am s0 w0rry kerezey with my sweet ro0mate wh0 is really in l0ve with gathering, I am h0ping that she’ll be there f0r G0d. h0w I wish~ Yv0nne dear, I really h0pe that y0u find j0y, faith, h0pe, peace and l0ve in Him thru lifefire gathering. I pray hard f0r that, same as Beatrine dear ^_~. Y0u all are in my prayer “G0d’s nati0n”~

Nick sweet friend, w0w… thank y0u nick f0r y0ur sharing and all things that all of us have been shared during r0sary. It is really meaningful and really awes0me get t0 kn0w that 0wh.. yesss… itu la dat.. hahaha.. I am s0 happy 0wh, thru y0ur sharing, it really help, extremely helping, c0z I ever faced all that als0. Thanks f0r the “ultraman” hahaha.. h0nestly!! thru y0ur acti0ns “wanna help 0thers”, prayers and sharing really make my faith greater, make me feel that n0t 0nly feel that. It really help me t0 strengthen my Faith in Him. I am s0 happy when I talk t0 y0u, feel yeeaaa.. best! Nick dear sweet friend, I see FAITH in y0u!!! As if G0d gives me the faith He pr0mise me thru y0u. I am just s0 happy 0wh! Y0ur Faith t0ward G0d really str0ng 0wh! I want als0! Let’s strengthen 0ur Faith t0gether. Thank y0u s0 much ^^.

After I leave f0r LI then I d0nt have anyb0dy t0 strengthen my Faith.. sad 0wh me “G0d has a better plan, d0nt w0rry la Nick and y0u als0 Val- wahhaha… I talk t0 myself this”.

Beatrine dear, the m0ment I saw her smiled and laugh with me s0 happy was during waiting f0r Brenda graduati0n at café there. We talked a l0t, seri0usly a l0t, secret and everything~ she laughed and smiled really make me s0 s0 s0 s0 happy~ thank y0u Beatrine f0r letting me t0 enter y0ur life, t0 kn0w m0re b0ut y0u and always wanna cheer y0u up. I d0nt kn0w why G0d asked me t0 ch0ose y0u ^_~ because G0d wanna y0u kn0w that y0u are special. Really! I am telling y0u dis “sedih 0wh me”. Beatrine dear, I see H0PE in y0u!!! y0ur life tellin me that G0d always H0PE the best fr0m us. He send y0u t0 sh0w H0PE in y0u and me als0! Praise the L0rd!!! 

Debz dear, I am s0 happy t0 kn0w y0u this, especially 0ur first enc0untered during Manukan Island, I can feel the cheer in y0u dis. Even the time that we spent t0gether was sh0rt but it really meaningful y0u kn0w, y0ur smile and the way y0u sh0w y0ur l0ve t0 0thers really make me superduper happy. Debz dear, I see L0VE in y0u!! thru y0ur acti0ns, w0rds t0 0thers and l0ve la during LSS especially in serving fo0d f0r 0thers. It really make me happy and I can see the l0ve la all the time, y0u are s0 happy g0 lucky als0! I see L0VE in y0u!!!! S0 go0d t0 kn0w that G0d really t0uched y0u! Praise the L0rd! y0u always smile and we always laugh very happy2, “as if we satu head dis” hahaha… I can feel G0d’s l0ve in y0u as He pr0mise me that He’ll sh0w His l0ve t0 me.

w0w… I just n0ticed that 3 0f y0u really meaningful in my life. H0w I wish that I n0tice that early!!! G0d s0 hebat 0wh!!! He really give me FAITH, H0PE & L0VE as it is s0 real this. I still remembered that I asked f0r Faith and L0ve during LIFEFIRE CAMP, he gave H0pe lagi f0r free. Then, n0w thru His ch0sen pe0ple, He sh0ws t0 me what He had pr0mise t0 me the FAITH, H0PE & L0VE. This is what I feel, n0w I feel s0 str0ng dis, with this three sweet friends, they really cheer my life. W0w… H0w d0 y0u feel if y0u are in my place? I am just s0 t0uched by His Greatest L0ve, infinity L0ve. S0000oooo…. T0000uuuuucccchchhhhhhhhh……. <cry2 kunun, lols..>

“And n0w these three remain: FAITH, H0PE and L0VE.” 1 C0rinthians 13:13 But, the greatest of these is “G0d’s L0VE”. 


 Amen. G0d’s l0ve is s0 tangible this!!! I l0ve l0ve l0ve 0wh!!!!

1 thing f0r sure that I’ll d0 is lifenite will be my destinati0n during internship!!! N0 matter what happen, I’ll g0 there t0 w0rship G0d, mum and dad, s0rry k, please understand my desire t0 w0rship can??? Please please please ^_~ (sh0wing s0me l0ve 0r perhaps eerrr~ “tears”) hahaha… kerezey 0wh me.. Crazy f0r G0d! Amen!

Dear all my l0vely friends,

I am g0nna miss y0u all~ really really miss y0u all f0r sure, n0w als0 I can feel d~ duh, em0 dis~ I l0ve y0u all!!! Sincere fr0m my Heart (l0ve shape). Thank y0u f0r always be near with me, even smile als0 en0ugh that!! Mwwaaxxx… Daddy G0d, thank y0u f0r the w0nderful children!!!! I L0VE Y0u L0rd Jesus.

<<My guardian angel tepuk2 my sh0ulder d, times up, it’s time t0 shui jia0 d~ t0mm0r0w need t0 wake up early f0r c0nfessi0n.>>

Thank Y0u Daddy G0d ~_^

 

Life in the Spirit Seminar!!!
I really really wanna g0. h0wever few days bef0re that. I didn’t plan t0 c0me even th0ugh I was the 0ne wh0 was extremely excited when they ann0unced ab0ut it at the 1^st place. H0nestly!!!! I wanna g0 s0 s0 much, h0wever!!!! At the eleventh h0ur!!!! Presentati0n need t0 be d0ne really by Friday. It made me upset and I d0nt think I c0uld finish it. My decision was n0t t0 g0 due t0 the presentati0n which is s0 imp0rtant f0r my gr0up members, meanwhile Jesus of c0z n0 1 but…. [The day bef0re- I still remembered when I was in gathering, I asked beatrine whether I sh0uld g0 0r n0t, she directly said YES! It did really mean a l0t t0 me, as the G0d says YES, y0u sh0uld g0 my dear. Then, I shared with everyb0dy ab0ut my day and s0ng “what if”- what if I cant j0in LSS? I was s0 sad!! All of sudden, Brenda dear sang a s0ng “~G0d will make a way, when there seems t0 be n0 way~” h0nestly, I felt like wanna cry y0u kn0w!!! h0ld y0ur tear~ =D]

I was in dilemma, sh0uld I g0 or n0t??? I need help!!! I need a hand!! A big hand t0 slap me!! Thursday nite d!! burning midnite lamp la “kunun”. S0, I just said a simple prayer “my Guardian dear, please help me t0 settle all these things, I need y0u. In Jesus name, I pray.” w0w.. everyting became very sm0oth and I managed t0 finish my slidesh0w and rep0rt!! H00oorraaayyy… G0d really sh0wed me the way!! He answered my prayer. s0meh0w, I think, all these were planned by Him, my instinct really tell me that daddy G0d really wanted me s0 much t0 g0 there because He g0t s0mething there f0r me. Creepy “what I felt that time"~ haha…

Jude talk!!!

Super duper best! Sy0k! I like like like!! repentance part als0 and healing part!

Yea!!!! Jesus is 0ur healer!! Thank y0u Daddy G0d =D

The rejected heals the rejected.

The loneliness heals the loneliness.

The lost heals the lost.

The pride heals the pride. "f0r me la"

I wanna bring all these to others, I wanna tell them h0w did Daddy G0d healed me.

Questi0n t0 p0nder 0ver “Will y0u ‘humble’ y0urself to God t0 t0uch y0u?” - Jude.

It really struck my heart. The w0rd of humble, I have never though that we need to humble ourselves infront of him. y0u sh0uld!!!!

When talk ab0ut forgiveness right, all I can say that I have a go0d heart, I always f0rgive pe0ple even though h0w bad they all. I’ll just say to Daddy God “0wh… Daddy G0d, I kn0w that y0u just wanna test me is it? Hehehe… just forgive them la although it is hurt, it is m0re hurt if I can’t forgive pe0ple c0z I’ll keep on thinking why they are s0 bad t0ward me “d0nt wanna make ma brain exhausted la”. Everyone sh0uld be f0rgiven. Just imagine if I don’t f0rgive pe0ple, [f0rgive us f0r 0ur sins as we f0rgive th0se] I’m scared that they will n0t forgive me f0r my small mistake. Mistake mistake mistake!!! I’m human though. To err is human, to forgive is divine.

1 thing that really KILLING me ab0ut F0RGIVENESS!!!!!!!

Why I always pray f0r 0thers instead of myself???? I asked many pe0ple ab0ut it.. I am curi0us y0u kn0w. Why?? N0 answers can satisfy me!! Then, bef0re the “inner healing”, I did s0me reflection. All of sudden, I just can’t st0p myself fr0m burst int0 tears, it really PAIN! Seri0usly, it really killin me that time. 0ne thing that I have never f0rgiven was me, myself, I hate myself since my b0th grandma pass away. I kept on blaming myself, why I seld0m pray f0r them bef0re they juz leave me al0ne here? Why G0d didn’t listen t0 my prayer? Why G0d wanna take all the pe0ple wh0 l0ve me s0 deeply ‘my 0wn parents als0 d0nt l0ve me like they did “I guess”’? Why he has never listened t0 me? Why? Why? He t0ok my special grandmaS from me “matrix and last year”. It was a tremend0us pain f0r me t0 accept this, because I d0nt have anyb0dy wh0m very cl0se t0 me and give advices when I have pr0blems, n0t even best friend, b0th are them l0ve me s0 much.. I knew that I’m the apple of their eyes. I’m n0t minta puji, very 0bvi0us bah.. but in pe0ple eyes, I am n0thing~ I always never been n0ticed by pe0ple c0z I used t0 be s0 quite and I have n0b0dy t0 share my burden, I was c0mpletely al0ne, I carried it by myself, all I can d0 was pray pray pray.. every nite I pray r0sary “matrix” h0ping f0r at least friend t0 g0 t0 church, I went church by myself even th0ugh n0 friend, the heart hunger f0r Him, His l0ve and EVERYTHING relate ab0ut him. Never missed f0r gathering and church c0z I knew that He will pr0vide. I Believe in Him. G0d sent them ‘b0th grandma’ t0 l0ve me because he knew that my life is g0ing to be hard <err? Beginner la> like “0ther pe0ple wh0 have that gift also”, perhaps He wants me t0 share my experience, He wants me t0 stand by my 0wn feet, He wants me t0 humble myself, He wants me t0 help 0thers wh0 are having the same pain- heal or share with them, He wants me t0 accept what he had plan f0r my life c0z He always has a better plan f0r every0ne of us. D0 n0t be afraid my dear friends.

I knew already why I always have the p0werful feeling which telling me that I was s0 unw0rthy in Jesus' eyes, it was because I never f0rgive myself f0r what I had d0ne t0ward Him. Pass few years, I ever tried t0 leave Him spiritually and mentally but n0t physically “what am I talking dis? C0rrect ka dis? hehehe” I mean I went church just f0r the sake of the ten c0mmandments, if n0t, n0 way I will g0. Half of me still believe in Him th0ugh half was rebellious. My faith? G0ne… =( I still remembered last year, Lifeliners pray 0ver me due t0 my tremendous Pain g0ne crazy, I felt s0 n0b0dy, I have n0b0dy d. I felt wanna kill myself, during that time, all I can tell à in progressing of c0mmit suicide. N0t only my pr0blem that I have t0 carry, 0ther pe0ple pr0blem suddenly bec0me my pr0blem, it was last year which really burden me if im n0t mistaken, many pr0blems juz attacked me, I wasn’t have many pr0blems th0ugh. Can y0u imagine the pr0blems that wasn’t y0urs and suddenly bec0me apart of y0u. @_@’’’??? I have had many pr0blems ok, shoo shoo.. My pr0blem was m0re seri0us and I was al0ne t0 carry it, why that time?? Can y0u aim f0r the right time? N0 was y0ur answer.. 0k, fine. I’ll just f0ll0w the rhythm of this pathetic life à last time th0ught. Hahaha.. it was s0 me.

Back to the track..

I hate myself f0r treating G0d like that even th0ugh He has never leave me al0ne, He always be with me, it was juz me, blinded by the REALITY. I sh0uld love Him instead of leaving him spirituality. Besides, I have j0ined many camps recently and s0 funny that I didn’t n0tice that I was actually d0nt l0ve myself, I cant forgive myself. Waa… s0und ridiculous yea.. hahaha.. apalah me dis~

The inner healing nite~

“I surrender myself t0 be healed and 0ne thing that I sh0uld d0 bef0re I can f0rgive 0thers sincerely is f0rgive myself”

I can feel the presence of G0d’s l0ve, he forgives me, He is s0 real!! He is my healer, He is my sweetheart and He is my EVERYTHING. As I can remembered, he whispered t0 me

 “Dear my children, y0u are mine, I am y0urs, take my hand and y0u’ll never be al0ne because I’ll be there f0r y0u, d0 remember this promise and never let me g0”. His L0ve is s0 infinite huge!!!

All I can feel was the H0ly Spirit really inside of me, during pray f0r each 0ther, Brenda, aiwen and me, I really felt that H0ly Spirit anointed me and f0r the first time in my life as I let H0ly Spirit take c0ntr0l in my prayer, it was a really n0t me, n0rmally, I’ll make my prayer as sh0rt as I can, I’ll say whatever my mind then d0ne. h0wever, that night really special for me, I manage t0 pray s0 c0nfidently and delivered G0d’s message t0 them, I can’t believe that!! I did it!! I have the c0urage and H0ly spirit really guide me!! Super duper happy!! Holy Spirit I L0ve y0u!!!!!

After that sessi0n, w0w… I felt s0 great, free, all the burdens… zaaapppp… hehe… g0ne la dude ^^

Then, with Nick went meet br0 eagen ^^ w0w… sis Melinda ^^ w0w… praise the L0rd!!! I was s0 happy that night. Dunn0 why, sharinG is carinG, carinG is lovE, lovE is everythinG ^^. If I shared y0ur pr0blem means I cared ab0ut y0u, why I cared f0r y0u dear G0d’s pe0ple? It is because I l0ve y0u like Daddy G0d loves you; G0d is love which mean G0d is everything. ^^ “I still remembered all the pe0ple there: br0 eagen, sis Melinda, nick, Daniel, daniels0n, eldrige, Elaine and me” juz shared and chit chat…

H0nestly, I doubted ab0ut the gift that G0d has given me, is it f0r REAL?? N0t only the gift, the feeling of Guardian Angel is just next t0 me and s0metimes at my back and s0metimes embrace me with wings and s0metimes pray with me, I can see my Guardian Angel als0, s0metimes.. I d0ubted all these feeling. I just knew ab0ut Guardian Angel last year, and the presence is s0 real. I still remembered, back t0 matrix, during I prayed f0r my late grandma wh0 suddenly str0k, I felt the presence of big creature was standing with a prayer hand, praying s0 hard next t0 my right hand side, I just burst int0 tears. I don’t kn0w what was it. Till t0day, I still c0uldnt f0rget ab0ut it. Frankly, I d0nt kn0w, th0ugh that m0ment really precious to me knew that I wasn’t alone. BIG QUESTION MARK F0R DADDY G0D. I d0ubt… I mean after the “inner healing” nite. Perhaps the next day Daddy G0d will answer me. H0pefully.

~I really can feel the “tangible love” of Daddy G0D~

I can see all the faces in his imagine!! Especially when y0u all smile!!! ~melt~ I am s0 in l0ve with Daddy G0d. I am s0 exaggerate dis!! Hahaha.. I can feel his L0ve is s0 real when y0u all hugs me and say that Jesus L0ves y0u. I can feel Him inside of y0u all. W0w.. w0w…. w0w.. Praise his Name!! Jesus!! I l0ve y0u Jesus and Your nati0n =) y0u all! 1 thing that I really sure!! He will never aband0n u and leave y0u juz like that f0r He is s0 REAL!!!!  I wanna sing f0r HIM F0REVER!!! JESUS, I LOVE Y0U!! Y0u give me c0urage!! I feel s0 ALIVE f0r the first time in my life!!! Wwwwww0000wwwwww… great!!! I wanna live acc0rding t0 y0ur will and n0t mine, I surrender my life f0r y0u because y0u are the reas0n I live, I PR0MISE L0RD ^_~. Without y0u in my life, im n0thing.

Daddy G0d, thank y0u f0r sent me Brenda dear t0 be my super duper sweet ro0mate >,<v thru her sharing between b0th us really meaningful, l0vely, w0nderful, sweet and fantastic. Praise the L0rd f0r the enc0untered with Brenda which was acc0rding t0 Y0ur planned L0rd, Brenda dear!!! I L0VE Y0U DEAR. JESUS L0VES Y0U.  1 thing that i learnt fr0m her kan, she said, let us seek the KINGD0M of G0D first and after that all what we ask or wateva "life" will be sm0oth just acc0rding t0 His will and He will never aband0n us. Sweet sweet sweet~ i like like like~ smile smile smile~ G0d will pr0vide ^_~v 

y0u all wanna kn0w??? hahaha... if d0nt want, i want als0 t0 tell! thank y0u f0r all wh0 had shared their experience in G0d, h0w their life change. I was s0 t0uched with all sharing that time. G0d really t0uch their heart, and changed their life! Praise the L0rd!!! me als0 wannnnnnaa share...... i was s0 excited during that time, my heart p0unding s0 fast, extra0rdinary fast. H0ly Spirit in me ^^ and their fire in me reallyyy waaa... i wanna share, h0wever, t0o many pe0ple wanna share and d mike juz went ar0und that area ='( s0bs.. s0bs.. waaa,,,,, times up... i was s0 sad.... wawawa... i ran t0ward Brenda... wawawa... I juz hugs her la with d0t d0t d0t... ='( hahahaha... kerezey 0wh me.. dat als0 sedih.. apalah.... the fire bah dat.. ish3....

I am infinity happy!!!!!!!!!!! happpyyyy.... hahahappppppyyyyyy.... Thank y0u Daddy G0d. I will humble myself t0 receive and serve y0u pe0ple ^^. Daddy G0d's planned f0r me thru this camp, waaaaaa... hebatlah.... Praise the L0rd. Thank y0u Daddy G0d my beautiful savi0ur f0r all sweet, cute and w0nderful friends "all of them yang j0in that camp 0f c0z ^_~v." thank y0u Jude, Felix, Yv0nne, Brenda, Anne, Beatrine, Stef, Rose, Pat, Debz, Arwen, Angela, Melinda, Debbie, Pricilla, Datina, Elaine, Nick, Jon, Daniel, Daniels0n, Eagen, Teddy, Lawrence, Edrige, Daniel Khoo, Sharlene, Fenny, 3 little y0ung super saiya, D0r0thy and all of y0u la... i feel s0 blessed dis with y0u all~ yeay!!! i like that feeling~

Bapa, ke dalam tanganMu akanku serahkan hidupku. Pakailah diriku ini dalam kerajaanMu sesuai dengan kehendakMu. kasih Tuhan sungguh indah, melebihi dari segalanya. Engkaulah Alpha dan 0mega. Holy Spirit captivates my s0ul, and everyday I grow t0 love the H0ly spirit m0re, y0u h0ld my life in y0ur hand. 


p/s: s0rry dis, juz wanna share dis, ma w0rds als0 tunggang langgang d~ 

^^ smile smile and smile ^^

remember 0ne thing val dear, Daddy G0d l0ves u ^^

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. Matthew 11:28-30

Beautiful Saviour Lyrics - Planet shakers!!! (Live!)

I will sing f0rever!!

Jesus I l0ve y0u !!! Jesus I L0ve y0u!!

this is my pr0mise >,<v

L0VE NEVER FAILS.

Jesus Christ My L0ve

i love y0u my savi0ur!!!!

thank y0u f0r the calling t0 LSS last friday, 16 0ct 2010

thank y0u s0 much for the w0nderful experience that y0u gave me.

thank y0u f0r letting me t0 l0ve y0u. i'll never ever d0ubted y0u again.

thank y0u f0r the w0nderful and cute sweet friends that y0u send t0 me.

thank y0u Daddy G0d. W0 ai ni >,<v

p/s: later im g0in t0 share my cheerish m0ment with G0d there.. wait yea ^^

Ungrateful~~~~

h0w i really wish that i can be s0me0ne yg happy g0 lucky~ i x feel grateful with my lyfe dis~ 
h0nestly! i am n0t happy g0 lucky girl~ i am not happy and lucky enuf... sigh~~


"this is n0t me"- i feel s0me1 feeling dis~ hahaha...

HELP!!

i feel s0 helpless....
help me... aaaaaa........
hate 0wh.......
LSS!!! eeee... ='((
i really wanna g0..
n0t my calling ka?
i'm d 0ne s0 bersemangat wanna g0
all of sudden...... tut.. tut...
i wannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn................................................

10.10.10 mass

Yesterday mass, 10 oct 2010

I dr0ve ma sista“s” and their b0yfriends t0 church and all I can feel was the warmest of happy family dis~ b0th 0f them with their sweet 0ne even th0ugh my 0ther sista’s b0yfriend is n0t Cath0lic but he willingly t0 g0 with her. Sweet~

I always imagine that if my wh0le family c0nvert Catholic, I’ll be the happiest pers0n in da w0rld! Frankly t0 say, yes it is true!!! I always want it t0 be like that. But I seld0m pray f0r that as I was too busy with 0ther hassles -_-‘’’ huhuhu..  life always like that la~ I kn0w y0u d0nt get it. Wh0 cares~ hahaha… cruel 0wh me.. nevermind la, this feeling is bel0ng t0 Daddy G0d ^_^

Then, incident that was really sh0cked and t0uch my heart f0r the wh0le day was when a little cute girl,ar0und 5 or 6 year old played with my nails. She is s0 ad0rable dat, with m0le like mine dis “[fulamak perasan minah s0rang nie]” hahaha… yea, cute girl. She played my nails then I played with her als0 while singing “best all the s0ng!!”, I mean garu2 her leg, elb0w, palms la and used my nails t0 make her hands itchy dis.. she seemed fun and s0 d0 I! l0ls~ then 2 of ma sista teased me and played with her b0yfriend’s fingers! Lols~ y0u are s0 funny!!! Hahahaha… then, bef0re went c0mmuni0n she h0ld my hand and her m0m’s hand and 0verlap it “h0w t0 say yea?” as if she wanna me h0ld he m0m’s hand and sayang that hand as I sayang her hand bef0re dat. I was extremely super duper surprise, huh?? I made that cute girl satisfied by d0 as she want. W0aaa… after that, I need t0 let her g0 during c0mmuni0n, as I went back t0 my seat, the three of them didn’t g0 f0r c0mmuni0n. hmm???

I c0ntinued playing with the little cute girl after finished my prayer. when we all asked t0 stand, she h0ld my hand and her m0m’s hand!!!! As if I am s0me0ne wh0 are very dear t0 her and she really feel c0mf0rt t0 h0ld my hand, s0 d0 I. 0f c0z la, have y0u ever had this chance t0 h0ld by little kid?? I am terribly sh0cked!!! H0nestly, meanwhile, I feel extremely happy ^_~ I d0nt kn0w why~ feel s0 cl0se with her, make me happy, her smile really sweet^^ really make me super duper happy. Finally, time f0r us really sh0rt!! She needed t0 g0 back d, after I made a sign of cr0ss, I to0k her hand and taught her t0 d0 s0, her m0m help f0r the “amen” part. As if my child dis, hahaha.. I was the 0ne wh0 busy t0 help her d0 sign of cr0ss. Time t0 g0~ s0bs.. s0bs… I asked her name, then she t0ld me, I am s0 sh0cked again! I cant get her name as it is t0o l0ng “kristen …..” I speak English t0 her of c0z but I speak bm t0 her m0m.. lols~ apakah… why yea?? She likes me ?? hehhe…

As I dr0ve back al0ne, “s0mething” really struck ma heart.. I d0nt kn0w.. I really wanna cry, “kurezey!! Y0u are driving dude!! Watch 0ut the r0ad >=( if y0u cry then y0u w0nt be able t0 see the r0ad clearly, hitz fm als0, sad s0ng plak dat time” I d0nt kn0w… why I felt s0 sad?? That girl?? Her family?? What is it?? I was s0 clueless f0r the wh0le day…

My reflecti0n thru that incident: I d0nt kn0w.. perhaps, that little girl has the same feeling as me, perhaps she really want a true catholic family? Family pr0blem? 0r perhaps she wanna me t0 pray f0r her family? Ok kristen dear, n0 pr0blem. ^_~v val cheche always help u =)

At that time the disciples came to Jesus, saying, “Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” And calling to him a child, he put him in the midst of them and said, “Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Mathew 18:1-3

“y0ur faith has saved y0u”- the g0spel that really t0uch me during that mass

life life life ^^

Keep on thinking of 0ther pr0blems make me f0rg0t ab0ut my 0wn pr0blem dis, h0nestly!!! As if I d0nt have pr0blem dis, but after settled everything they 0l pr0blems… whhh000aaa… y0ur pr0blems… 

brakk..buraakkk… krakkkakkka.. “books dr0p fr0m bookshelf as you are g0ing t0 take a bo0k fr0m it and n0w y0u are buried under the bo0ks.. aww~… its hurt! My head, and I d0nt d0nt kn0w what t0 d0 d.. hahaha… funny iz it? Lols~ geli my hati y0u kn0e… nevermind la, perhaps n0w I am in happy mo0d “seni0rs graduation” s0 all the pr0blems als0 seems happy t0 me even th0ugh there is a time when “s0mething” struck y0u =p whateva la dude.. wh0 cares… 

~R0sary prayer bef0re GATHERING~

6 0ct
dear daddy L0rd G0d,
there is n0ne like y0u, y0u are the REASON i LIVE!!!
w0w... r0sary prayer bef0re gathering, everything was d0ne acc0rding t0 y0ur will, y0u asked us t0 pray r0sary!! as m0ther Mary als0 asks us t0 pray r0sary, always ^^
with0ut 0thers help i d0nt think that i can deliver the message that y0u wanna tell all of us dis. ^_~
y0u are s0 great daddy G0d. 
<<H0W GREAT IS 0UR G0D>>
Special thank 2 Nick!! we have same p0wer kan! ultramen p0wer "terpaksa me mengaku dis"
thank y0u f0r c0ming very early and lead the r0sary prayer! y0u are the best! y0ur prayer bez 0wh!! jasmine prayer als0, debz als0.. me???? i juz pray whatever i feel during that time or if i have the str0ng feeling ab0ut that situati0n/ wateva it is then i'll pray la~ hehehehe... thats why last nite, i was kinda nerv0us saying a petiti0n prayer f0r r0sary, unexpected that i was asked t0, takkan i wanna say n0 right. 0k daddy G0d, i will ^_~v

hehehe... gathering!!! as usual!!! awes0me!! super HEBAT!!! 
I L0VE GATHERING!!!

2nd DAY 0f R0SARY PRAYER

5th 0ct

i managed t0 reserve the p0nd0k near cafe! hahaha.. it was because me with shameless went t0ward the guy wh0m i th0ught a girl at the first place, f0rg0t t0 bring specks during that time. =p
thanks G0d, he is Cath0lic as well! name r0ns0n fr0m csg ^^.. " l0ng time d didnt g0 there" ish3...
r0ns0n didnt j0in us, next time h0ping that he'll j0in la.
waaa.... 5 pe0ple "nick, ambrose, debz, aiwen, n me"!! praise the l0rd, the number was increasing c0mpared yesterday. yeay!!!best!!!
then we did s0me sharing~ G0d is great 0wh.. when few pe0ple gathered, then he'll be there f0r sure.

1. Then, i g0t t0 kn0w s0mething thru the sharing, ehhh... many things~ to0 many miracles, dreams, visions, problems, burdens, confusion, frustrati0n, sadness, dissatisfy, doubtfulness, depression, anger, etc.. 
2. Sharing is sharing, caring is l0ving and l0ving is everything~ praise the L0rd!!!
3. Special thanks t0 nick yang full of determine wanna d0 r0sary prayer everyday!!! yeay!!! best la!! thanks nick! 
4. Praise the L0rd!!! i am n0t al0ne!!! fuhhh.... G0d, y0u are s0 w0nderful!! i l0ve y0u!! y0u bless me with many w0nderful friends!
5. I can felt the presence of daddy g0d and 0ur guardian angels with their wings on t0p of 0ur heads!! 
6. N0t 0nly me!! I am n0rmal!! ^^ i will say yes t0 daddy G0d, n0 matter what happen. LEGA!!!

hehe... i th0ught i am g0nna be happy after i knew that n0t 0nly me...
there few 0f 'em are als0 like me!! yeay!! i scream!!
i was lo0king f0r these kind pe0ple als0 be4 and try t0 appr0ach them
th0ugh, why i have the heavy feeling which s0meh0w saying that, get ready f0r it,
s0mething is waiting f0r u~ eeerrr... i am afraid, daddy G0d...

i get c0nfuse with everything la~ that night was really hard f0r me, PAIN.. dunn0 why... 

i should feel happy, h0wever... am i shocked? 0r perhaps i think to0 much.. Shared t00 much?

For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them. Matthew 18:20

1st DAY 0F R0SARY PRAYER!! YEAY!!!

4th 0ct
I was thrilled that three of them turned up to the r0sary prayer dis.
s0 s0rry, My fault that I kept they all waiting f0r me, s0rry Ambr0se and Nick!!! 

Alisa!!! Thank y0u f0r j0ining us! It was a very great r0sary prayer even though f0ur 0f us 0nly, h0ping f0r many pe0ple t0 c0me, I d0 pray that.. 

Daddy G0d ^_~v im just s0 happy. U make my day really w0nderful, h0nestly, pretty go0d! with giving me parking near café there! W0w!!! Miracle! U kn0w that I was kinda late and Y0u give me luck dis! Praise y0u Daddy G0d!!! I l0ve y0u ^_~v 


For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them. Matthew 18:20

lets pray r0sary

~Hiding all my pr0blems~

Dear Daddy G0d, I l0ve y0u s0 much!

Y0u are my hiding place! Yes, indeed!

0nly y0u can take all my hassles and sadness away.

Best friend, y0u said y0u are my part-time angel??

I th0ught Daddy G0d send y0u t0 me,

guide me, cheer me up, advice me, etc

Why s0 suddenly y0ur path is s0 different than mine??

I can’t get it..

Why??

Tears, keep 0n flooding my eyes…

N0w, 0nly y0u L0rd, wh0 can c0ns0le me and st0p this tears?

0nly y0u can feel the l0neliness 0f this heart.

Y0u are being s0 nice t0 me.

"Y0u are n0t al0ne dear child!"

Lift y0ur name on high Daddy L0Rd! Praise y0u L0rd Jesus.

M0nth 0f r0sary~

1 0ct 2010. W0w… during that night while I was studying, all of sudden, I had the desired t0 pray r0sary, I saw my r0sary bracelet that was given by my friend “Azie” s0 beautiful 0wh.. shinning 0wh… I was s0 aghast and it really made my desired t0 recite the r0sary bec0me str0nger. Th0ugh, I really f0rg0t Friday is which mystery d!! crazy!!! I texted ester and he said Friday is s0rr0wful mystery, I felt s0 ashamed 0f myself~ during I recited the r0sary, I c0uld feel wings were 0n the t0p of my head, as if it c0vered my head! H0w t0 describe yeah?? Kinda hard la~ eerr… ok2.. d0 y0u believe that every0ne 0f us has their 0wn Guardian Angel? I just knew ab0ut it early this year, bef0re this, I ever felt the existence of “s0mething”, “s0mething” which I didn’t pun actually was pr0tecting me and always be with me, I th0ught that was only my sensitivity~ n0b0dy kn0ws.  After recited the r0sary, I felt s0 happy and peace. >,< thanks M0ther Mary!! I l0ve y0u M0ther Mary.

Have y0u ever felt light was on the t0p of y0ur head while y0u were


praying with cl0sing y0ur eyes? S0metimes I feel that. Hmmm…??? 


D0es it means h0ly spirit?? Daddy G0d?? M0ther Mary?? 0r that is 


0nly y0ur eye g0t pr0blem during that time? Whateva la~ 


CURI0US~ MYSTERIOUS~