It's all about ME and GOD ♥

Dear faithful God,

You know how much You really mean to me. Thank you for yesterday, today and the days ahead. The love that You have given us has shown your greatness, your care for me, your support, your trust, your comfort & sweet word, your encouragement, your consolation, your confidence to me, your  angel whom you send to me, your love and your presence in my life “just next to me”, Why I always fail to hear your voice in time of all the hassle come and why i Hesitate? Pardon me oh dear God.

I soon realized how important a.k.a. 重要 my life to you Lord even though I am not as clever as that girl, lack of confidence, lack of bible knowledge, not as slim as that girl there, not as good as them when do presentation in front, not as good as them in prayer, not as creative as them in doing cute things, not as soft spoken as them, not as important as other people but still lord, You see me as pure gold, you know how many hairs in my head, you know everything about me. 

                   

Why should I doubt myself? 

Why should I hear all the human thought voices which will lead me to the darkness “You are not confident enough, you can’t do a good prayer, the leaders are so upset with you, PEOPLE ARE LOOKING AT YOU AND GUESS WHAT? THEY ARE BLUR, you don’t have abilities to do that, you are not good at her, you SHOULD feel guilty now! why la u don’t give a hand? why you are so stupid? why you always alone? Why and why and why!” All the voices come from your human side and not from the spirit side.

Why do you care about all that voices?

Do you think it is come from God? Do you think God will say such word?? Will he? Of course not! He’ll support you in all good things that you gonna do.

Hey! And he’ll say “Dear my child, you are confident enough and I’m here with you, don’t worry okay? You can be a good prayer, be confident and you know that you are good at even it is just a short prayer, people are listening to you coz u are delivering my words to them, they need time to digest all that. U don’t need abilities to do that, have FAITH in me. You are clever as everybody, you are not alone because I’m just next to you, always and forever” ♥♥♥

How wonderful is our GOD He created each and everyone of us equally, based on his image. He creates you and me like a genuine NIKE and not the fake Nike. 

Don’t feel unworthy because you are always worthy to Him. He’ll always lead you. Don’t listen to all the negatives voices, those are not come from God, it’s either from our human voice or the evil one.

I’ve learn about boundary. There is a boundary in all things we has made actually. One of it is EMotional Boundary. Special thanks to my deary brenda! I love you bren! *Hugs.

Well, hmmm… Eventually, I’m facing that now. Hahahahhaahaha…. I f I say I am stupid? Cannot.. God will not say such word to you, why la u minta puji mau lebih advance than God.

I promise myself that I’ll try my best not to use the “SHOULD” word coz I just wanna try la. Hahahaha… I’ll say no when I really mean no! Hehehehhehee… 

First step that i'm planning to do is Reflection about myself... The strength that i have which can help to support myself in making decision wisely, prudent and let my yes mean yes & no really mean no. It's my choice. Not yours. God has given us free will. So, don't feel bad about it okay dear Valerie?? Hehehhe... ♥♥♥


God Saranghae ♥♥♥

I'm Thankful

Dear Jesus, I stand in awe of you.

Thank you for making me LAUGH when I’d almost forgotten how to. =D

Thank you for Your FAITHFULNESS, STRENGTH, PROTECTION and for the BLESSING.

Thank you for my family, ministry and community for supporting and loving ♥ me.

Thank you for Your encouraging touches and miracles in the midst of pain and suffering.

Thank you for being my defender and rock of salvation.

Thank you for calling me to serve You in M.A.D camp.

Thank you for the wonderful people who always pray for me.

Thank you for the wonderful people surrounds me.

Thank you for stirring in me a desire to give.

Thank you for Your wonderful and unfailing LOVE ♥!

Thank you for LOVE ♥ You freely give.

Thank you for the answered that You’ve shown me.

Thank you for my LIFE and the grace of surrender to You.

Thank you for teaching me thru life’s circumstances.

Thank You Jesus for making ALL THINGS POSSIBLE.

Thank you for Your Holy Spirit and Guardian Angels who always be with me.

Thank you for giving me strength to endure and peace for the journey.

Thank you Jesus Christ, for your promise to be with us when we are gathered in your Name.

Serving as an intercessory team

For me it is staying in touch with God who gives me that Good Orderly Direction that I need in order to take care of my problem in order to STAY OUT of FEAR. If I'm not keeping up that connection then I'm wandering off doing my own thing which 9 times of 10 isn't the best thing for me or anyone else around me for that matter. A lot of the CRISIS that has happened in my life is self imposed. Ughhh.. I hate to admit that! Acting on bad decisions will put me out there in the quicksand.. Seemingly without any way out. It's a scary place to be and though I know God's there waiting to give me a hand up and out I still seem "stuck" and unable to do anything about it. Fear paralyzes me. *SiGH….

           

How awesome is the Lord most High!! Praise God for all the miracles happened.

I am amazed by You Lord Jesus!! Humorous God! Awesome M.A.D camp! Transformation time! =D the experiences were unexplained superb, infinite wonderful & countless blessing!! THANK YOU JESUS FOR MAKING ALL THINGS POSSIBLE. ♥ ♥ ♥ Jesus, You are my Rock of salvation =)Top of Form

                               

In this many times camp was the awesome camp ever! It is not about the experience of receiving from God but it was about the experience of GIVING and SERVING God ~ Ommmggeeee~ *melt! God! You are awesome. I’ve been joining many camp and LSS as well; I know that im still in a process of identifying myself, who really I am? And yes! I wanna gain many experiences and receive a lot of things “gifts”. As a time being, I have no longer craved for gifts and keep on receiving. Somehow, I knew that, now is the PERFECT TIME for me to give and serve God. I felt that I should give as well, help out~ coz kan my cup is overflow bah! Seriously crazily overflow! I can’t receive more.

“I have shown you in all things that by working hard in this way we must help the weak, remembering the words that the Lord Jesus himself said, ‘There is more happiness in GIVING than in receiving’” Acts 20:35

I wanna SHARE!! Help!! It really troublesome me you know. How am I going to share this overflow?? I don’t have any idea dude! Till one time that I feel that I should step up from my comfort zone. Now is the time to take the COURAGE and say YES, Lord. ONLY ME, MYSELF know when is the right time to say that. God, I am Ready! None can decide for me or telling me “you are ready that, I know…” ohh… pleaassseee… I am bit different than other, but thanks for your concern! I’m overwhelmed now!!! With big SMILE on my face! LOL.

“Then I heard the Lord says, ‘Whom shall I send? Who will be our messenger?” I answered, ‘I will go! Send me!’” Isiah 6:8

-God can use us right now, right where we are. As we say “Yes Lord”. He’ll give us opportunities to grow in LOVE, FAITH and HOPE-

Last but not least, Thank God! I’m satisfied with what I’ve done, Holy Spirit really worked in me. I can feel its presence, who always ENCOURAGE me. It was a blessing! Thank you Father God for stirring in me a desire to give and creating an opportunity to serve Your people in a way that glorifies You. All the plans were great even though there were times that I felt that “I should giving up” doing all things especially in prayers. Duh, that’s normal Val. Whattt??? Hahahha… Meanwhile! Community really help. Thanks everybody! This was my 1^st time serving in Lifeline! I’m glad to know and work with you all. Looking forward for it in future! Keep it up!

“And so ENCOURAGE one another and help one another, just as you are doing now” 1 Thessalonians 5:11

I Love You Jesus

I trust in You! Always! I’ll keep on believing You.

‎"We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps." -Proverbs 16:9

i love this verse so much =) *A reminder for me -wink wink-

Psalm 95

¹ Come, let us sing for joy to the LORD;

let us shout aloud to the Rock of our salvation.

² Let us come before him with thanksgiving

and extol him with music and song.

³ For the LORD is the great God,

the great King above all gods.

⁴ In his hand are the depths of the earth,

and the mountain peaks belong to him.

⁵ The sea is his, for he made it,

and his hands formed the dry land.

⁶ Come, let us bow down in worship,

let us kneel before the LORD our Maker;

⁷ for he is our God

and we are the people of his pasture,

the flock under his care.

Today, if only you would hear his voice,

⁸ “Do not harden your hearts as you did at Meribah,^[a]

as you did that day at Massah^[b] in the wilderness,

⁹ where your ancestors tested me;

they tried me, though they had seen what I did.

¹⁰ For forty years I was angry with that generation;

I said, ‘They are a people whose hearts go astray,

and they have not known my ways.’

¹¹ So I declared on oath in my anger,

‘They shall never enter my rest.’”

Amen

You know my Heart's desire Lord. =) Thank You Jesus! Love You!!

DiscourageSSSS

-side feeling-

Have you ever felt that people just using you, feel something is not right, hhaahaha… this is not the point la.

with blur face in the middle of nowhere

You know, it is very hURT when people show you their AngRy face”dislike face”, or bLaming you because they want you to be there as soon as possible to give back their room key, sort of thing like that, then, blaming you for being late to be there “showing hatred face”, teasing you till you feel isolated, blaming you for menyamaking their place, disrespecting you when they talk,  not appreciating you to be there, saying that you are so not into this ‘group/ same head’,  suddenly saying something rude like to shoo you out from the place, then, not bringing you to their gossiping topic because you aren’t in the same boat.

Yea… maybe i’m different, but it doesnt mean i’m feelingless =’(

How i WISH that i can run away from this life!! I juz wanna be like in Korean drama, where one day i found my enjoyable life with an understanding Boyfriend or Husband. Live happily ever after without any hassle anymore. Yes!!
O God, Please listen to my stupid cry out “huh?” Val, enough dreaming.

"ma future house- in my dream i mean"

I dont wanna be isolated by people who live around me “sometimes only la”, whom i call my biological family”

i am sick and tired with all this feeling, need to deal with!!! with all things have happened!!
Sometimes,
 i Thank God for giving me this Full Bar OF Patient In ma HearT!
 Praise You LorD Jesus Christ
HowEVER!!!!

i need these now please!

and then this

aGaiN !! 

& for desert

and 

Pain?

I realized what pain feels like. Do you? 

I don't even want the desire to be content.

I can only hope for silence.

Everyone needs a reason to stay alive — someone who justifies your existence "God"

I don't even know how to explain how much pain it will cause la....

It just really HURT when nobody cares~

Yet, i know that God will never leave me, He'll never ever abandon me. Never. 
He hears my prayers. Always.
Let My life be according to His will. Amen.

ER CHOSEN 2011

SPIRITUAL ATTACK + SPIRITUAL WAR FARE = SPIRITUAL EXHAUSTED = SPIRITUALLY WEAK

Have u? if yes, HOW DOES IT FEELS LIKE? “I FEEL GOOD~” ??? Hahahhaha….

To be honest, it was really hard for me to get rid of these attack and war fare thingy. I am 100 percently SPIRITUALLY TIRED, damn tired.

“Thru You I can do anything, I can do all things~ lalalla….” It was really tough for mmmmeeee eeveeennn to sing this song. Huhhhh… *long sigh*

Can you imagine that suddenly u fall into a very deep dark hole. Shiver-shiver~ You keep on scream and scream and scream, but no audible sound coz u haven’t taken you lunch yet during that moment. 

Meanwhile, you feel tired and hungry which equal to no energy. 

Kao Meng ah!!! Appa Amma, ngo hai li tou ah!!!

You feel unsecured and scared to death “maybe yes or maybe you’ll juz act cool even though you are not, LOL”

Gosh!!! Can u imagine that you are alone there, in the dark hole.

Anything can happen, I mean, snakes~ worms~ scorpions~ and many scariest insects there.

STOP Thinking ABOUT That anymore~ EEeerrrrr~


Lighttt!!!! What?? no light!!??

What can you do if you face this situation?? If you ask me then I’ll say that I'm hopelessly praying for the light "only"


BECAUSE 

With the light, I can see ALL THINGS. Hahhaha.. but I prefer if 

“Prince Charming” come and save me. ~SWEET~ 

Shoo shooo~ im not daydreaming but OVER dreaming…

WAIITTT!!!, my story haven’t ended yet.

Hahahaha.. this was happening to me before I go ER 2011 CHOSEN. I called it <TOUGH JOURNEY>


ER 2011 CHOSEN
"But you are chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God's special possession, that you may declare the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His wonderful light" 1 Peter 2:9

-Empowering Leadership=Humility
-Worship Leading &Vocal Workshop!!!! Superbest!
i've juz love it *so much


Andre Ong =) Wow =) You are the best =) I like your talk =) Your jokes =) smiles =)

The spirits leads you! Amen! P&W!!! I feel so ALIVE! AWAKEN! 

EMPPOWERED!!! Well done! Keep it up =)

Hospitality Ministry!! 
You all the best!!!!

Wow!!! Make friends with a New bunch of Meow2 youths!

                                     vicky!!!! miss u so much!!!! =))

Willing To Share

“Be rich in good works, ready to give, willing to share.” –  1 Timothy 6:18

As one of my sis in Christ told us that “Sharing is blessing”, w0w! I gotta tell ya that i love it so much! =). Well, with our gifts that God has given us, are we goin’ to use it by our own sake? We accept the gift and keep it for ourselves? Is that what God want us to do?

Love is giving for the world’s needs,

Love is sharing as the Spirit leads,

Love is caring when the world cries,

Love is compassion with Christ like eyes. -Brandt

I'm gonna share God's love to others!! ^^

God’s love is so real!!! His wonderful plan for me is really-really infinite wonderful; His grace is enough for me. 0h yeah! I feel so great! Every morning seems very great morning for me.. Especially when you are far from family and friends, it feel different when you are staying with relative that has different religion. So far ok la =) last year I told God that if I’m going to stay at home doing my internship nearby, then I promised Him to go Wednesday Gathering at YPC there, same as Lifenite, gonna stay at my aunt’s house perhaps. But now?? Hmm.. He provides everything for me! I can’t believe this happened to me. Very perfect life =) feel so Empowered.

G0d's Answered

He answered the Big Questi0n Mark in Ma Head last nite! < lifeline >

Whhooaaa... i gotta tell ya! i felt peace that m0ment and i saw the light~ just a light~

Thanks t0 2 br0 n sis fr0m Australia wh0 had prayed over me. Thanks t0 Kayla as well f0r sharing her experience and advices in making decision in 0ur life! i'll bear in mind all that! G0d bless y0u all!